People you see on Instagram: Millenial Edition

People you see on Instagram: Millenial Edition

Aloha! I thought I’d start 2020 with a ‘fun’ post on Instagram stereotypes. Before anyone who this post targets come for my neck, it’s a joke so live laugh love people.

VSCO Pro’s: Super chic with a capital C. Thinks the right filter makes the photo look deep. Favours a black and white cityscape. Wants to move to Paris,obviously. They won’t shut up about the fact they used Tumblr before it went mainstream.

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Soft boys: Selfies with eccentric captions. Will comment on your photo with “πŸ‘€”. Will take selfies while lighting a spliff incase no one knew he smoked weed. Shares his taste in music through Instastories repeatedly.

Influenzaaaas: Internet version of Influenza. Influencers will use the ‘gram to plug everything from hair extensions to weight loss drinks (judging you). Their selfies all look immaculate, they know how to werk that pose and their posts are glamorous but very dull. They probably order lemon and herb at Nandos. #cheekyspon

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Huji girls: VSCO girls but less original. Incense and yoga and half lit photos with seductive hair and captions that have no relation to the post. Has at least two finstas and one of them is a poetry account. Carries around their polaroid everywhere.

Hard boys: Captions photos of their new whip with Drake lyrics. Always trying to rope you into a pyramid scheme. Will comment “πŸ‘€” on your photos. Type to post a shirtess selfie and write a caption about the fact he’s done trusting people

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Boomeranger: Self explanatory. Boomerangs favoured include: Bath bombs dropping into a bath, drinks clinking together, car radio, etc

Travel basics: They’re going away and they want you to know it. Their name written in sand with a heart? Tick. Unimaginitive airplane wing? Tick. Hot-dog legs at the beach? Another tick. A photo with a drugged tiger? Stop being basic and enjoy your holiday please x #CatchFlightsNotFeelings

Gym junkies: Viewing someone’s workout is like writing a grocery list. Everyone does it but no one cares to see yours. Or something. We think it’s great that you hit your targets !! But we don’t care. Put away the sweaty selfies please.

All About The Aesthetic: ThEy foLloW a ThEme. Favours instagram worthy shots of pastel paradise locations such as Γ‰lan cafe or Peggy Poschen. Think sugar, spice and all things nice.

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Are there any other types of Instagrammers you love to hate? Let me know!

If you want even more basicness, follow me on Instagram: @Naveeshaaa

 

 

 

 

Life lessons of 2018

Hello Perkirinos! (I have no idea why I’ve given you guys a fangirl name but hey ho)

How was your Christmas? Was Santa generous? Did you manage to spend a whole evening in the vicinity of your family and manage not to murder anyone? If the answers are amazing and yes then congrats, you’ve managed to have a decent Crimbo. I would have done a lovely festive little blog post on the big day but I was too busy procrastinating and buying last minute presents obvs πŸ™‚

Instead you get this lovely Pre New Years post which is actually on time for once, atta girl!

So….2018…

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it’s been a year of transitioning, feelings, change and memes…

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I am ready for 2019.

Writing this post is probably the best thing for me right now. Having done an intense three weeks of group therapy (that’s 9-5 everyday, talking about your feelings folks) means I’m more focused on what I need to do, who I need to be and who I need to do it with next year…

Or maybe this is all bullshit from a raging 22 year old with a detrimental sleeping pattern and unhealthy coping mechanisms…but I can only take it with a pinch of salt πŸ˜€

I tried making a set of very unrealistic goals in September 2017 and only achieved one (to graduate lol) and that told me that I put way too much pressure on myself and need to take things one step at a tiiiiime…(cue Jordin Sparks acapella)

I’m hoping that 2019 becomes the year of the grind. I have no idea what to do with this blog, I wish I could make it a ‘thing’ but its a crazy mix of personal shit and I’m not sure I’m comfortable with my very own stream-of-consciousness to be made public. Considering making an active travel and lifestyle blog but I have no idea what I’m doing.

If you have any advice on what I can do or even about my current life state then feel free to comment and send memes etc.

I just realised I titled this post “Life lessons” but I didn’t actually offer any lessons. I am a certified dinkus

One thing that really stood out for me this year is the absence of self-love and confidence that leads to my depressive funk and inability to place the blame on things other than myself. I need to figure out how to give myself self-love, believe in myself and stop doubting myself. Not sure how much of a grip I can get on this in 2019 but I’m gonna try!

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“I miss you” season is nigh

Winter is coming. You heard it here first. The sky is blue and black, mulled wine is coming back and that neighbour you can’t stand has his house all decked out with lights and a minature Santa flashing on the roof. It’s also when the feelings of dread and loneliness hits those suseptible to the “winter blues”. Maybe sitting on your coach tussled up in your warmest blankets listening to Frank Ocean on repeat isn’t enough and you’re craving a companion to help you make it through the winter. Yes, “I miss you”season has hit and it’s time for another year where you’re targeted by the Lonely.

Bootycalls are coming so hard you can’t keep up with all the “Yo you up? I need a cuddle -insert unblinking eyes emoji-” and it’s giving you a headache having to free your phone storage. It’s hard to fathom that a little cold weather instantly turns men into horny teenagers but it’s happening. Suddenly a season is being used as an excuse to fornicate with every Tom, Dick and Harry on Tinder.

Let’s not forget the men who use winter as an excuse to target the emotionally vulnerable. That ex you keep trying to shake off? Suddenly he’s suggesting Winter Wonderland dates where you can wonder around bustling markets holding his hand while you attempt to take cutesy couple pictures. Seems innocent enough. How about that friend who has been attempting to escape the ‘friend-zone’ for months but you’ve been escaping his clutches every time? Ice Skating Between Friends starts off sinlessly but he’s grabbing you everytime you nearly fall, trying to take your hand at every occasion and that mistletoe you both walked past looks very conveniently placed.

Friends this is the time to remain painfully aware. Emotions will be driving you crazy. Especially seeing photos of perfect couples on Instagram documenting a perfect Winter of Love where everything is perfect and you have no reason to feel lonely or alone. But we must fight these feelings and curve the preying men on sight. Winter will pass and you will still be lonely and single and that’s okay. There’s always Spring.

12 things in my life scarier than your usual Halloween shit

1. Student debt – more than Β£30K worth. Can I get a hell yeah?

2. Couple costumes – No we don’t want to see you both dressed up in cutesy little matching Fred and Velma. It maketh me sicketh.

3. The term “slaps”. Like “this song really slaps”. It sounds like something your Dad would say while trying to sound cool.

4. My crippling depression. Yeah πŸ™‚

5. The current USA gun crisis. I am fucking terrified.

6. Adulting. When does it start to feel natural? How do you do know if you’re doing it right? Can you return it without a receipt?

7. My bank account. All those minuses πŸ˜‰

8. Jamie Oliver. NOTHING IS SACRED ANYMORE

9. My nightmares. Complex, scary shit that would send my dear Freud in a tizzy.

10. The term “Social media influencers”. Sounds a bit like brainwashers beaming hypnotic vibes out to us. You-must-buy-this-weightloss-milkshake